me rite pritty won day

I read an article recently in the Wall Street Journal.

I like to open a posting that way because it makes me sound so erudite... didn't everyone read an article recently in the Wall Street Journal? Actually, it was the WSJ online, and I only read the article because somebody had posted it on Facebook. OK, a genius I'm not. But the point of the article, the demise of proper grammar and usage in the workplace, is one which is near to my heart.


I'll be the first to admit that I'm no expert on this topic. Although I was issued a Warriner's English Grammar and Composition textbook every year from grades 8 through 12, I don't recall opening any of them once, let alone actually doing an assignment or learning anything from them. I write run on sentences from time to time, and I know I'm guilty of rampant comma abuse.


So no, I'm not an expert.  Nevertheless I'm pretty certain that most of what I write passes the red face test when it comes to usage and grammar (I guess those who are so inclined can whip out their blue pencils right about now).


No, what really irks me is the complete and utter disregard of any attention to detail when it comes to spelling.


If you spend a good portion of your day sending emails to colleagues, clients, and vendors you should know how to spell. Period. End of story. This is non-negotiable. When I receive an email with multiple misspellings, it always plants a seed of doubt in my mind about the sender's intelligence, no matter how smart he or she appears to be.


So if you're not a good speller does it mean you're dumb? No.


Actually, yes.


Because no matter how smart you are, if you're too lazy or careless to check your work, to proofread an email or letter you're sending out, then that's dumb. It doesn't matter if it's going to your mom, your boss, or your entire team. "Peel" and "peal" are two different words. But they're both spelled correctly and spellcheck will give both the thumbs up. If you can't tell the difference between the two, you should be concerned.


There's an account person in my office, almost 30 years old. A nice guy, smart and personable. He's used the word "piecemeal" several times in email over the past few weeks with the following spellings:


pease meal
piece mail
peace meel


I know he's smart, but when I see something like this, I can't help but think he's dumb.


Every one of these "piecemeal" abominations contains words that are spelled correctly, but none of them add up to "piecemeal." And that's because he is a spellcheck abuser.


Spellcheck, originally intended to be an assistive tool to the writer has now become the most abused tool in the box because users simply assume that if they don't see any red squiggly lines in their email, it's good to go. So by correcting spelling, spellcheck actually promotes misspelling.  Which kind of defeats the purpose, if you ask me.


Predictive text and autocorrect aid and abet this epidemic of abysmal writing. Does it make for some funny text messages? Yes, absolutely. Appropriate for the office? No, not really.


The problem is not insurmountable. Proofread your work. Don't just scan it quickly. Really read it. Think about what the words mean. Do they make sense? Do you really want to "serve it up on a plait," or "raze the bar"?


Eye no if wee wood awl pay a tension weed beet offal spelling once and fore awl.